Implements of fire and smoke¶
The record of the expedition of
the brave adventurers Grýla, Svish, Róża and Robal
onto a mission from chief Gutwad
to retrieve a hoard of illuminations
Swamp goblins¶
XXVI VIII MMXXVI
A length of time had passed since our adventurers left for their first travail, but the village chief needs them to render their service again in the cause of the tribe. From upon his throne of riches and through his own voice he names them Chosen and calls for them to venture into the swamps to brave its many dangers and retrieve a stash of explosive artifacts guarded jeallously by an exile named Vorka.
Equipped with a totem for good fortune by the chief, the brave knights learn as much as they can of this people eater’s vile and numerous crimes from the tribe and perform their various preparations before setting out in the morning.
In the swamp they encounter a creature with innumerable legs whose want is to devour the children of the fair Toadlicker people who stray into the wilds. They detect this monster easily through their expert tracking and deliver vengance unto it through magic, blade, arcane artifact in a tremendous and prolonged struggle.
Having made the village safer thus, the brave company approaches the strange abode of the exile: a large wooden house built as if upside-down, with floors tapered into a point, but a large, broad roof. And that surrounded by a pallisade and guarded by a foul behooféd beast whose long snout hid rows of viscious teeth.
Knowing better than to approach such a dangerous creature directly, our heroes opt for a circumspect approach, trying to distract it by setting its tail aflame, then swarming it from all directions with the force of arms. Alas, even this calculated strategy yielded many wounds upon the knight Róża who took upon herself to persevere the beasts iron blows in protection of her comarades and delivered upon the creature the final blow.
As they recuperate from their activities martial, the adventurers prepare to explore the strange architecture of the mysterious house and face the mortal peril of Vorka the Exile.
𝍸𝍸𝍸𝍸𝍸𝍷 / 𝍸𝍫 / 𝍸𝍸𝍸𝍷
So’s we waz eating snails and this gobbo comes and says boss wants to talk to youse, so’s I put slugs in my ears, because everyone says the boss is so loud you die, but boss actually says we are good and special, so I did not need the slugs also. I gave Boar some ear slugs too, but he ate them. Good thing Boar is also special.
Boss says go get explodives from the swamp here is a map, they are in a thing, we will know it when we see it, and Vorka is there also, who used to live here. She is there now cuz she eated other gobbos from the village, which is bad, youse only supposed to eat gobbos from other villages (and longshanks and stuff, and also normal food). I think maybe she ate herself, cuz there was no other goblins because she lives in the swamp now, but boss says prolly not. Boss also says there is a many legs there what eats children. I thinks it is ok, because we got initiation already, so many legs can’t eat us, but boss says it might try anyway. These things are confusing.
Boss had lotsa good stuff though, so I took some. His two guys were not happy, but I gave ‘em The Look and they let me take some stuff, like a puppit, it’s in the bag with Boar. Then I askeds around the village to see if anybody who got eated by this gobbo who lives in the forest can tell me about her, but nobody who I know got eated, so I didn’t have anyone to ask.
So we’s went to sleep instead and then we went inna swamp. We thought there might be monsters and things, so I had Boar look, he is very smart, I only needed to tell him a few times, and soon Grýla, Svish, and Róża found that many legs. Good job Boar! They went all setting it on fire and smacking him with horse choppers and also Svish hit him with a pan. I trieds giving it The Look, but it didn’t see, so I went to bite it instead and it spit all webs at me. It was tasty.
Then we went and found the thing, it was like a house but all built wrong and there was a fence and there was a horse also. It would probably be best to set everything on fire just in case, but the explodives might be inside, so I says let’s not set it on fire all at once. So Grýla tried to set the horse on fire so it runs away, but she missed, so Róża went and sliced it a bunch, but it kicked her, so’s Svish magicked at it and I climbed the fence and jumped on its butt, but then Róża gutted it and I fell down. And then Grýla put all mud on Róża so she doesn’t die yet and also Svish put healing magic on her so she didn’t die in the end. Boar did nothing, which is probaly fine, because he is small and horses are scary.
